My Life as a Fallen Archangel
by sylar1610
Summary: This is an biography of Gabriel's life. It has some of the moment from my previous story only extended.
1. Early Years

I do not own Supernatural.

Early Years

Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what your going to get. Forest Gump said that and it really applies to me after all when God created me right after Michael and Lucifer i never thought i'd become a pagan trickster but that a bit to far ahead in my story so lets start at the beginnig.

I remember the day i was born, most people can't but angels can. I remember God spoke my name and i existed. It was then me, Michael, Lucifer and Raphael saw the face of our father, a face which no eyes would ever see again. His face was so amazing and indescribable that to even try would be impossible.

I remember God made us the Archangel and after us came the Angels. God loved Lucifer more then any of us, more than Michael, more than me but none of us were jealous after all Lucifer was such a nice guy and he really looked out for me. I remember he taught me how to use my powers.

'Alright Gabriel this is how you clone yourself' he said creating a copy of himself. 'Now you try' Lucifer's copy finished. I concentrated and created a copy of myself. 'Yes' i cheered as i saw Lucifer smile but i lost concentration and the clone disappeared. 'No' i moaned 'I'll never get this'. 'Of course you will' Lucifer said putting his hand on my shoulder 'Now try again Little Brother '

I remember the day of Lucifer's trial. God called me, Michael and Raphael to his chamber. 'Lucifer what you done' God asked. 'I have done nothing Father, I merely showed your newest creation for they truely our, monsters' Lucifer said. 'It was not your place to do so' he said. 'Father how can fault me for this, you love these abomination more than us, more than your first creations, your beautiful and perfect angels, how can do this' Lucifer said

'I think you mean more than you' Father said. 'This has nothing to do with me' Lucifer began but was interrupted by God. 'What you did to Lilith was unforgivable, You are no longer in heaven and if you attack the humans again your punishment for that will be a thousand times worse'.

Lucifer began to leave but turned and said 'Tell me one thing before i go, Why do you prefer humans to us?' 'They have something you will never have' God said. When Lucifer left Heaven I turned to my Father and said 'Father Don't you think you were cruel to Lucifer'.

I thought he would smite me instead he said 'One day Gabriel you will understand why i did this'.You know what he was right because i do understand now.

Of course Lucifer did not heed Father's warning and next thing I knew it was Michael was at war with Lucifer and they were going at it like Freddy vs Jason. Michael came back to Heaven and i was worried I had lost a brother.

'Lucifer's not dead Gabriel, he''s been banished to hell along with Lilith and the Angel who supported him have either been killed or stripped of their grace' Michael said heading toward Father chamber. I was sad at this and nearly broke down crying but Michael interupted. Get Raphael and meet me in Father's chamber' Michael said. 'Is Father ok' I asked. 'He's gone' Michael replied.

With Raphael the three of us searched everywhere on Earth, Heaven and even Hell but to no aveil. God was gone and Michael took his place as Leader of Heaven. It was actually easy seen as how no but the three and Lucifer had ever met God.

After Lucifer fell and God's disappeared I got lonely. All the Angels wanted to do was blame all the problems on Humanity. I probably would have joined them but what Dad said kept repeating in my head 'They have something we can never had'. Of course at the time i didn't know what he meant.

I went to a part of Heaven where Angel can play Big Brother on the Earth and decided to look down on the humans till i discovered what God meant by that. It was there that I met the greatest friend I ever had in heaven.

When i got there their was already another Angel looking down. She turned and saw me. 'You can look to if you want' she said. 'Ok' I said and sat down and joined her. 'So what bring an all powerful Archangel to here to looked at Earth?' she asked.

'I'm just trying to figure something out' I said. 'What' she asked. 'I was told the Humans have something we don't and I want to know what' I said. 'Well isn't it obvious' she said. 'No' I replied. 'Keep looking and tell me in a few hours' she said.

So I looked at the Earth and all the Humans and I saw crime, hatred, corruption and violence and this frightened me but I saw something else to kindness, selflessness,joy, laughter and most of all love in all shapes and forms. It was so beautiful I nearly cried. She looked at me and said 'Do you have your answer'. 'Yes' I said 'Thank you for showing me this'. Anytime by the way I'm Anna' she said. 'I'm Gabriel' I said extending my hand. We shook hands and that was the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

After that day me and Anna were the best of friends and it didn't take me long to figure why she envied Humans. It was because had the ability to love. Now Angel have this ability to but it can only be unlocked by spending time with humans and learning empathy from them.

But Anna well let just say their was certain Angel in Heaven she wished she could love(But i'm told she got that wish one day before being betrayed). Yep i remember him, a certain Pretty Boy angel who was always hanging out with that bad influence Uriel.

I remeber the day i met another good friend in Heaven. Me and Anna were walking around the Garden talking about Humans when we met him. 'Gabriel do you think we're the only angel in Heaven who don't hate humans' she asked. Before I could answer he came out of some of the bushes and said 'Don't count on it'. 'What do you mean?' Anna asked. 'I mean very few genuinely hate humans, most just don't understand and are to afraid to actual learn anything about them' he said

'Who are you' I asked. 'Name's Joshua' he said. 'Never heard of you' i said. 'Most people haven't, i keep to myself and rarely leave this garden and the one that have heard don't consider me important enough talk to' he said.

'What do think of Humans' Anna asked. 'God made them so they most be important' he said 'They may be strange but I can't help but like them'.

From that day on Anna and Me were frequent visiter to Joshua's Garden. Archangels are suppose to be all knowing and yet Joshua had a wisdom that no other Angel had, maybe God made him that way or maybe he just had a lot of time to think while he gardened. If i met him now their is about a thousand nickname i could give him from Dumbledore to Yoda.

Over time I grew more bored and restless in Heaven. I went for a walk a found myself in Joshua's Garden. 'What brings you her today' he asked. 'I need some advise, If someone does feel like their in the right place what should the do' I asked. 'You know when a flowers not getting enough light in a certain spot i take it out of the ground and move it to a spot where it can get enough light, that answer your question' he said sounding like Mister Miyagi.

It did answer my question and I knew what I had to do, but first i had to say goodbye. I went to Michael first. 'Hey Michael can I talk to you for a minute' I said. 'Make it quick i'm very busy' he said.

'Listen Michael, God gone and I don't he's ever coming back, and I think you need to stop wait faithfully for him to return like a dog and start thinking for yourself and being a real leader' I said. Michael was speechless, odd are he didn't know what to think without Dad their to tell him.

I left his room but before i was gone he said 'You should get a good seat Gabriel in a while we're sending a flood to drown all the people in the Black Valley. I knew the first thing i had to do when i got to Earth was warn them.

I went to Anna next. 'Anna there's something I want to tell you' i said. 'What is it Gabriel' she said. 'Before I tell you I what you to think long and hard before acting on it ok and don't tell anyone I told you this' I said. She agreed. 'If you want to become human you have to tear out your grace out throw it to earth' I said. 'What?'she said. 'If you want to become human you have to fall from Grace' I said.

After her i said goodbye to Joshua and was prepared to leave when I saw Castiel. I went over to him and said 'I have something to tell you'. 'What is it Archangel Gabriel' he said. God he was such a tool. 'Don't be an Idiot your whole life' I said and walked away leaving behind a confused Castiel.

As I was about who shows up but Zachariah, he is a leech always sucking up to me and especial kissing Michael's ass. In fact in his life he's done so much ass kissing that his breath probably smells like shit. Before he could even get a single compliment in i stuck my middle finger up at him.

The look on his face was unimaginable. He could turn every shaid of red anger and the veins on his temples began to bulge but before he could even started yelling and screaming he realised he was in the presence of an Archangel. So instead he forced the fakest smile on his face and said 'Thank you Sir' his voice shaling with rage and walked away.

I could stop laughing the memory was forever burned into my mind and then I realised I was laughing, I had never laughed before and it was one of the greatest moments of my life.


	2. Conversation with Death

Conversations with Death

First things first had find me a vessal. There he was bleeding to death after being attacked by a wolf in Northern Europe. 'Hello' I said. 'Who said that' he said. Ask a more obvivous question why don't you. 'My name is Gabriel and I'm here to save you'.'Really' he said skeptical 'Why and How would you do this'. 'I need you to say yes so I can possess your body and use it as a vessel' I said. 'And how would that save me'he said nearly choking on his own blood. 'It either that or die here' I said

'I guess I don't really have much of a choice so yes you can' he said. With that I entered his body and possessed him. With that I stood up and the wound disappeared.I was about to teleport to the Black Valley to warn them when it hit me. If Michael and the God squad sense me they'll take me back up to Heaven then he'll kill me.

Then it hit me. I had heard of magic that can effect angel. Enocanian magic, so I hold out my hand in front of my chest and branded my new rib cage with an enocanian cloaking spell. That should keep Big Brother off my back.

I teleported to the valley and began to tell people about the flood. As you can imagine everyone though i was drunk or mad. But one person believed me. 'Did you say their was a flood going to happen' he said. Finally someone who believes me. 'Yes it's going to happen show and if you don't have some sort of boat then you'll all die

'My son has been having visions of a flood for many mouths now and insisted that i build an ark to so we would be safe' he said. 'What your name' I asked 'Noah' he said.

Well listen you've got to get you and your family and anyone else who believe us on that boat cause in a fews hours the Black Valley is going to be the Black Sea.

After a few hour we managed to get about 40 people on the ark along with a breeding pair of every animal native to the area. As tyhe rain began to pour I teleported to higher ground.

I looked down as the water began to rise and all those not on the ark began to drowned. I watched as the ark was lifted by the rising water and sailed to safety.

'Come to watch the show have you Gabriel' I heard a voice behind me say. I turned around and saw a man dressed in black, he was very thin like a living skeleton.

'I think you have me confused with someone else' I said wondering how he knew who I was. 'No i don't those little scribbles on your rib may stop your brothers from finding you but not me' he said sitting down on a rock next to me.

'And who are you?'I asked. 'I wouldn't expect something like you to know me, I'm Death at least that what i'm called here' he said. 'What do you mean something like me' I said offended. Who those this guy think he is.

'You Angels seem to think you are important but to me you are but insect and that only because i have these microbes know as Humans to compare you to' he said. 'So what make you so important' I asked.

'I'm Death itself, I'm above all thing, nothing can escape me, nothing can beat me, no one can cheat me, i'm inevitable, everyone will dies, you, your brothers, even God' he said. 'You must be joking Angels can't and neither can God' i said in disbelief.

'You sure about that, well we'll just have to see with one of use is right in the end' he said. He looked down on all the people dying, sighed and said ' Do you know how much I hate your Brother right now. He kills all these people and expects me to harvest all these soul by myself, Your family seems to view me as their maid'.He sounded digusted at the thought of this.

'Have you ever thought of taking on some help' I said. 'What do mean?' he asked looking at me. 'I mean why don't you give something else your ability to harvest soul, that way you don't have to do it all by yourself' I said. He thought about it for a second

'That not a bad idea' he said getting up off the rock and grabbing a human soul from the water. It was a woman pleading with him not to take her. 'Relax' he said ' Do you not want to go to the other side for final judgement'

'No' she said 'I fear were i would go'. 'Would you like to stay here and work for me reaping souls' he asked her. 'Yes that would be fine' she said. 'Then you shall be my first reaper' he said placing his head on her forehead and some weird creepy shadow went into her.

'You need a new name for your new life' he said. 'How about Tessa' i said 'It's a nice name'. 'What do you say' he asked her. 'Tessa' she said 'Yes that is my new name, my real name'.'I think i'm going to like you' Death said ' Now go and harvest the souls'.

With that she was gone and he turned to me and said 'I to most be off those souls won't harvest themselves'. He began to walk away but turned when i called to him.

'Hey do you mind not telling anyone you saw me' I asked. 'Well since you gave me such a good idea i'll pretend like i never saw you but just remember i'll be seeing you soon Gabriel' he said in a tone so creepy it would make Freddy Kruger wet his pants.

After he left i soon realised something. I was free no family breathing down my neck, no prophets to protect.I didn't care what Darth Vader there just told me he's not going to get me. I'll use my wits and I'll outsmart anyone who tries to kill me. I have the powers of a god and the world is my oyster. It time to do the one thing my brothers always stopped me from doing, I'm going to have some fun.


	3. Bumping in to the Family

Bumping into the Family

After my little meet and greet with Noah and the Grim Reaper I decided to travel a little. I heard that the the city of Sodom and Gomarrah were full to the brim with vice and sin and wanted to see what was so bad these place. Let me tell you something when to got there it was amazing their were practically rivers of wine and alcohol to drinking with i began to develop a taste for.

And the women, my god were they hot. I swear in those two city the virgin was extinct. They called New York a city that never sleeps well those people obviously had never been to Sodom and Gomarrah. I tell you i could have stayed there forever the fun i had enjoying the earthly pleasure that the Humans have. But one day my fun was ruined by a certain Pretty boy Angel and his douche bag best friend.

I remember it like it was yesterday, I had just left the brothel and was on my way to the bordello way all of a sudden I sense a familar presence. I turned and saw them walking down the street . It was Castiel and Uriel. Now want were Starsky and Hutch doing here.

Uriel was examining the surronding with a digusted look on his face.'What a digusting vermin invested pit, I'm glad Michael has given my the pleasure of purifing it' he said with a smug look on his face.

'Uriel their are innocent people here, children' Castiel pleaded 'I beg of you at least spare them'. Uriel looked at his friend with confusion and said' Castiel, your sympathy for these beasts is foolish, and these children will one day grow into vermins and criminal just like the adults, I'm marely preventing that from happening'.

'You know Anna would be happy with this' Castiel said in an effort to protest. Uriel laughed 'What does it matter what she wants, Zachariah is her superior and he will be delighted that I've exterminated these cities of scum and sin'.

Castiel stilled looked uneasy. 'We must our orders Castiel even if we don't like them, remember what becomes of Angels who disobey' Uriel said. 'Very Well' Castiel said.

It was then that they walked pasted me 'Out of my way, you filthy maggot' Uriel said to me not recognising who I am.'Didn't your mother teach you any manners' I shouted after him before disappearing out of the city.

From in the desert I saw the light of Heaven shine down and incinerate Sodom and Gomarrah like a magnifying glass incinerating ants. Could I have stopped this, No i couldn't have, not without giving myself away.

Where do I go now. Maybe Scandavian would be a nice places. With that i teleported to my new home.


	4. Exit the Archangel,Enter the Trickster

Exit the Archangel, Enter the Trickster

The day I clipped my wing and became Loki the world's most famous Trickster. Now that is a story worth tell. It all began in the little town of Dalr one autumn night. In was in this building, i can't actually pronouce it's name correctly but roughly translated it meant the house of drink and meat

Now I remember this town was basically a farming community and it also had trouble with a population of wolves that lived on the outskirts. Every now and again the wolves would come in and kill the livestock and with winter just around the corner the town relied on the local hunters(not monster hunter) to protect them and their livestock.

Now if I remember correctly their was this big dumb hunter named Olaf. Big stupid fellow looked like a troll or that guy Fat Bastard from the Austin Powers movies. He was one of the biggest bullies i ever met. He used to steal food and have his way with the local virgins and whores. That royally pissed me off, those are my whores. And worst of all people just let him get away with it, if they did complain he'd just threaten to stop protecting them.

Now one he pushed me over the edge and I let him have it. I was sitting in they minding my own business, enjoying a nice pint of ale when all of a sudden Olaf kicks the tavern door open letting a cold breeze as he does it. He comes in swinging a wolf's head around bragging about how he just killed an entire pack.

'Yes' he said to his fans 'The first one I killed by slicing it's head clean off, then the leader of the pack I killed with my own bare heads'. Yeah right odd are he just found a dead wolf and cut it's head off.

'Egill' he said refering to the barman 'Pour me out a pint of your strongest ale'. 'Sorry'he said 'All out, all i've got left is mead'. 'Bah, a child's drink' he said and notice I had nearly a full pint off ale.

He smiled, snatched the ale and pushed me off my barstool. He drunk it all in one go and let out a burp like Barney out of the I got up he pulled out his sword, What a surprise their's no blood on it.'If you have something to say, say it to my sword' he said holding it to my throat.

Yeah I've got something to ask you' I said getting up 'How did a worthless fat ass like you ever become a hunter'. He was about to swing his sword in anger but a laugh from an unseen source stopped him.

'Who dares laugh at Olaf the great wolf slayer' he shouted. More like Olaf the great man whale. Nobody step forward. It was then Olaf turn to a local farmer in the corner.

'You there' he said pointing to him 'Are you the farmer with the giant pig. Oh yeah he was the farmer with the second biggest pig in the village, the biggest being Olaf. 'Yes' he said nervously.

'Kill it and have it brought to my house, it will be delicious' he said. 'But Olaf my family needs that pig to survive the winter' he pleaded. Olaf laughed and said 'I'm sorry but i thought i was the one who protects your family from being killed by wolves'. 'You are but' he began but was interupted by Olaf.'And if i were to stop protecting you from the wolves, what would happen?' he asked.

'The wolves would kill us' he said sadly. Olaf then picked him up by the scruff of the neck and held him in the air and said 'Then I think one pig is a small price to pay for the safety of your family'. He dropped him.

'You shall have the pig brought by you eldest daughter, the one with the large bosoms' Olaf said smiling at the thought. 'Ok' he reluctantly agreed. Man that was horrible i've got to give that guy what he deserves.

When Olaf left the tarvern i followed him until I was sure we were only. 'Olaf' I shouted to get his attention. 'You!' he exclaimed moving closer towards me 'You are the tiny man whose head should be on the tavern floor'. He drew his sword.

'You want a pig I'll give you a pig' I said snapping my fingers. With that Olaf the hunter began to change, his skin turned pink, he nose became a snout and his finger fused together and become hooves. Olaf the hunter was gone and in his place was Olaf the pig.

'Hey did you just turn that guy into a pig' i heard a voice say from behind me. I turned around a saw a hot blonde woman looking at me. 'Em' I began searching my brain for an explaination.

'Are you a Trickster ?' she said 'Yes' i said taking this as an excuse. 'Nice to meet you I'm Freya, I'm also a God' said. 'I'm Loki' i said making up the name on the spot.

'I've never met another god before' I said turning on the charm 'But If their all as hot as you, I can't wait to met them'. 'Your not so bad yourself' she said eyeing me 'What do say we have some fun'

'I loved to but first I got to take Olaf here to his new home' I said remembering the plan. 'Very well i'll be in that house their' she said pointing to Olaf's old house. It was the biggest in the village and probably belonged to some else before Olaf extorted the village.

I brought the pig to the home of the farmer who he was bulling today. I knock on the door and the farmer answer 'Hey buddy, listen Olaf wanted me to tell you he sorry for how he treated you today and told me you don't have to give him your pig, in fact he want you to have this pig' I said giving him Olaf the pig.

He was overjoyed at this and couldn't stop thanking me. I heard that year the pork had a very Ale like taste. Anyway so I went back to Olaf house and prepare for a night of passion with Freya.

I opened the door and went into the bedroom and saw Freya lying on the bed completely naked. 'What took you so long' she said before i ravaged her.

The next couple of hours are a bit Pg 13 but let just say I gave Freya the night of her life. Yes I'm sure that after that night when she was with another man she was thinking of me. In fact i'm surprise the bed held, my complements to the person who made it.

After that night I was no longer Gabriel the Archangel, I was Loki the Trickster.


	5. Kali

Kali

Well after turning Olaf into a pig and meeting Freya I began my new life as a Trickster. It was fun, I went after arrogant jerks and gave them their just deserts. As for me and Freya well our fling lasted 10 years and what a 10 years, she definately knew how to have fun.

But after a while we just decided to go our own ways. Any this story is about how I met my true love Kali. It begin is in a village in southern Germany. When I got there I notice something strange. I was the only guy there. According to the women their husbands and sons and brothers had all run off with some whore as they called her.

Now I definately had to meet this women who put a whole town under her spell. I went to where the women told me she was in a clearing in the forest. Their she was sitting on a throne surrounded by the villagers waiting on her hand and foot. And man was she hot, she had a body that could melt the ice caps.

She noticed me and said 'You there come here and fan me'. Weird Poison Ivy seemed to think I'd fallen under her siren song. 'Hate to break it to you princess, but I ain't under your spell like these poor saps' I said refering to the villagers. 'Very well then kill him' she said to the men as they began to gang up on me.

After a few punches and telekinetic throws they were all on the ground screaming uncle. 'Who are you Princess' I asked. 'My name is Aphodite, the goddess of love and you are. 'Name's Loki the Trickster' I said snapping my fingers. With that the men disappeared.

'What have you done to my men' she asked.' Well I sent them back to their wives and since their already in the dog house I sent them there'. She seemed angry. 'I was going to have an orgy with them' she said coming up to me 'You better be good or I'll break you in two'

Any the next couples of hour are a bit adult. Let just say I was good because I'm still here. After that she spoke to me 'There is a meeting for all gods at Greece in the next few weeks. I was sent here to tell the Northern gods.'

After that I started heading south to Greece while Aphodite gather more gods for the meeting. When I got their I saw gods from every culture on the planet, their must of been 200, their were Celtic, Norse,African, Asian, Greek and Hindu.

I saw all sort of god harvest gods, gods of elements, head gods and everything. There was enough barrals of wine and food that could feed an army. I decided to mingle and get to know everyone.

The first people I talked to were the Carriggans. They were the quintessential 50's couple milliniums before the 50's. Years later when I would watch Happy Day and see Mr and Mrs Cunnigham I'd always be reminded of these two.

'Why hello there and who are' she said in the most pleasent voice you could hear. 'Name's Loki' I said. 'I Edward Carriggan and this is Madge' he said extenting his handing. I took it and shaked it and said 'Nice to meet you Mr Carriggan, Mrs Carriggan'.

'Come now, Mr Carriggan is my father' he said even though he didn't have a father 'Call me Edward, so tell me what are you a god of ?' We're gods of the Winter Solstice in Celtic Ireland' Madge said. 'I'm a Trickster' I said.

'Oh isn't that just darling' she said' We just love Trickster, so funny'. After talking to the Carriggans i went and talked to the Olypimians. All they ever did was argue. It was like being back in Heaven and watching my own family argue. As you can imagine that conversation didn't last long and I left before a fist fight could break out.

But after a while of mingling that when I saw her, Kali I saw her sitting alone drinking some wine and the second I saw her I was head over heels in love with her.

'Hi there' I said to her. 'Not interested' she said coldly. 'I was just being friendly'I said offended. 'And I said Not interested' she said. Another god came up us. Boy was this guy the biggest jock I've ever seen.

'This guy bother you Kali' he asked. Being possessive of his girlfriend, what next is he going steal my lunch money and give me a wedgey. 'No Thor nothing I can't handle' she said. Thor turned to me and grabbed me by the throat and said 'Who do you think you are'

With that the clone disappeared and I appeared behind them and said 'I think I'm Loki. Thor turned around with an anger look of his face but before he could say anything Kali said 'Oh yes I've heard of you, your a clown god or something'. 'I'm a Trickster I said 'Like just now I tricked your boyfriend'.

Thor went off angrily and I returned to the party. After a few hours Thor returned and was followed by an army of knights. 'What is this Thor' Zeus asked angrily. 'We are the Knight of the Lord from the Holy Land, and we are here to kill you Pagan scum. So these guys are a primitive version of what will one day be modern Hunters

'Thor, you betrayed us' Kali said. 'Just eliminating the competion' he said as he got his Hammer. Kali arms burst into flames, Lightning began to form is Zeus hands and Mars drew his sword and cried 'This is going to be fun'.

The battle was long and difficult and we lost a good few gods but in the end our superior strength and ability. Some of our fallen included Poseiden, Ameterasu and Horus.

During of the battle it was just Kali against Thor and he was about to rip her head off but I intervined. I knocked him to the ground telekinetically and pinned him there. I gave the pleasure of killing him to Kali. She smiled as Thor began to choke on his own blood. After that she began burning him alive with fire blasts. Finally she ripped his head off and he was dead.

After the battle i was resting and relax when Kali came up to me and sat beside and said 'Listen I don't say this often but I think i was wrong about you'. I smiled and she smiled.

'Hey Kali, their's a big fancy not far from here, where some rich dude live do you want to come attack it with me' I asked. 'Sounds like fun' she said.

And with that we had our first date, I know it's not the normal Romeo and Juliet, Harry met Sally kind of thing but still you can't say its not romantic.


	6. 152 Year Fling

152 Years Fling

No doubt about it the 152 years I spent with Kali were the best years of my life. Better than putting Zachariah in his place, better than my nights of passion with Freya and Aphodite, better then the fourgasm I with the original Charlie's Angel in 1977.

Our first date was attacking some manor belonging to some stuck up lord in Greece after Thor's betrayel . Man that was a great date, we got to watch the the servants being pulled apart by the horses, I feed Kali the guy's wife's entrails and we roasted marshmallows over his burning corpse, aw such a romantic night. And it got even better, Kali was all hands. When we woke up on the guys bed well lets just say we didn't want the fun to end.

After that we went from village to village, town to town, together the two of us were a walking natural disaster. Now of course I made sure that the people we targeted were stuck up assholes. Like their was this one guy, shopkeeper in Rome. He overcharge for everything especially when the people buying it were incredible poor. He charged people an arm and a leg so I cut off his arms and legs and let Kali eat them right in frout on him.

Their were times when Kali had me teleport her back to India so she could be worship by her own followers and let me tell you Kali when she angry is a scary sight. Once a villager didn't recognise her as a god so she massacred his whole. In fact if I had calmed her down she would have burnt down the building were all the children were hiding.

But apart from that India was a nice place, plenty of other god, not many were to keen of some norse trickster especial after Thor, although they never said it I read their mind and all they were thinking was 'Kali has the weirdest taste in men'. Well she could do worse she could date Tom Cruise or Zachariah. Some on the Gods were ok, Ganesh was nice guy. I remember sometimes we used to shapeshift in to elephants and stampede through the villages.

Agni seemed to like me, she found me funny and said that if things didn't work out with Kali i should come see her. After we broke up I took her up on that offer. But Vayu he did not like me. I remember one night he tried to kill me but I was to clever for him and took away his breath.

Now like me tell the Hindu really know how to treat their deities. In Europe people worship us because if they don't we'll kill them but in here they love I mean they practical serving themselves on a silver platter which they actual were doing, even through I was just a guest god I got more wine and food then their is tea in China.

Speaking of China me and Kali decided to have a little spot there before traveling a bit more. The Chinese not the most friendly people particularly to gods from other countries like Kali or gods from other continents like me. We did have some fun one night when an army of about 500 hundred cornered us.

I remember that night so well. We were cornered and the soldiers were coming at us with their weapons. The moon was full and me and Kali looked at each other and smiled as if to say 'These guys are doomed'. Then she said to me 'I love you' and began slaughtering the soldiers. That night we ripped and burned so many people and I felt like I was floating, She loved me.

Now the next morning not a single soldiers survive and we burned all the bodies and for the first time ever I made love to Kali, sure we had sex before but this is the first time we ever made love.

After China we decided to head to Ireland. We went there and bumped into the Carriggans at Newgrange. Appearently the Celts built it for them.I remember the dinner we had with them. They served us one of their followers.

'Why it is so nice to have guest' Madge said. 'Thank you for having us' I said. Kali began to eat and said 'This is delicious'. 'Why thank dear' Madge said. 'I tell you these Irish make great meals, not like the Walsh to thick and rough, me I like my meat tender' Edward said.

That meals was a great one and talk about lot to drink. To this day I've never seen so much alcohol at one meal before but we were in Ireland so that to be expected. After the meal we watch a battle between two tribes and Kali man did she get excited watching it. In the end we decided to intervine all kill them all.

Of course the bodies didn't go to waste they were dinner for the next month. That about as long as we stayed there. After that we decided to head to Egypt and see the pyramids.

Ra didn't welcome us with open arms and we had to fight our way through an army just to get to seen the pyramids and the sphinx. Kali thought it would look better without the nose so we decide to redecorate as a thank you to the people for their hospitality.

However our relationship kind of fell apart in Spain. Kali and I were walking along the beach when she said she wanted to break up. 'Why' I asked. 'Because you are stopping me from realising my dream of destroying this world'. 'You wouldn't destroy this world and you wouldn't wipe out humanity' I said. 'Why not' she asked. 'Because, first off you need humans to survive' I said 'And secondly despite all the horrible thing you do to them, I think depth down in your heart you really care about Humanity'. At first their was a look on her face that told me I was right but then she became angry 'How dare you say that Loki' she said and began fire blasting me.

The fire was nothing the real pain was in the heartbreak. After a day or two of non-stop fire blasting she realised she couldn't kill me so left to return to India.

After that I became very depressed at lost my trickster ways. For a whole I didn't kill anyone. That was until one day in Rome. I was at a brothel trying to forget my trouble but I just couldn't when some idiot comes up to me and starts talking to me.

Now this guy thought he was God's gift to women how arrogent and how wrong he was. 'What's wrong' he said. 'The girl I loved left me' I said. 'So what plenty more fish in the sea' he said.

I really own that guy a lot if it wasn't for what he said right their I probable wouldn't have been able to get over Kali. But what he said really pissed me off. Plenty more fish in the sea he told. So I let him me those fish by turning him into Nemo and tossing him into the big blue.

It was that moment that reminded me who I was. I was Loki the Trickster. I was done pinning over Kali, no wonder she left me I'd gone soft. Now I know what I have to do. I have go back to being a trickster only a thousand times greater then before and show her that I can be the god she fell in love with. And you know what it work because over the next few we bumped into each other we did have short but sweet flings.


	7. When in Rome

When in Rome

Rome, now that was a civilisation. It was the greatest place in the history of the world. Wine, women, fights to the death on a daily basis, it was more of a Heaven than the lame ass Heaven I used to live in. Now the Romens really knew how to build city. I mean it, some of the places i've been their were piles of animal dung next to the butchers. But Rome, it was clean, beautiful and had hot and cold running water. It was better then Atlantis before Michael destroyed it.

Now it was there I had the time of my life, food and wine in the mornings, chariot races and fights to the deaths with gladiators in the afternoons at the collusium, brithels in the evening and at night some private time in the bath(course back it was a pool) at my villa with the company of some ladies of my own creation.

The fights to the deaths were some of the best entertainment i had ever seen. Guy slicing each other apart and being ripped to pieces by lions, bears, anything big and fercious. In fact some times I made the fights more interesting by creating some monsters of my own creation to keep the fight fun, just a few Hydras, maybe a Cerberus or two.

Living in Rome was like attending a big long party that went on for hundreds of years, the people their were the biggest hedons i'd ever met so has you can imagine i fitted in just fine. In I think Dean Winchester may have had some Roman in his blood, cause this would have been his type of place, before he decided he want to be a family man.

There I was glad i was able to create money out of thin air because in Rome I must have spent more money then Bill Gates and Mr. Burn have combined. But don't just that all I did in Rome was have a vaction, no way their were plenty of people who needed to be taken down a peg or two. In fact it was in Rome where I pulled the biggest prank of my career.

I saw the way the Roman treated the slaves and I realised something, everyone in the city thinks their better then the slaves so, I kinda caused the slaves to have a little uprising and rebellion lead by this guy named Spartacus, you might of heard of him they made a film about him. It was a good effort on their part but the Romans did to them what Tom Cruise did to Katie Holmes, force them into submission.

I met a lot of interesting people in that time period, I met Julius Caesars, Cleopatra on one of my trips to Eygpt she really knew how to treat a god if you get my message, I tell you Elizabeth Taylor didn't do her looks justice. I met Jesus as well, didn't tell him who I was and didn't stick around him to long cause I knew a big shot prophet like him would by under the protection of Michael, ever time he went to an new place it was like Elvis was throwing a consert. Eh Elvis he really was the King and he was so nice to his mother but i'll tell you about him later.

Speaking of Jesus, I know i'm an angel but Christianity really ruined a lot of the fun things about Rome, I mean after that no one could over eat or go to a brothel without being called a sinner. Christianity was like a parent bent on spoiling all my fun. I mean it no more wines, the brothel were going out of business with the women being called whores, and the violence was hidden.

Worse of all, paganism was being defeated, I mean it one minute the people are offering themselves on altars for us Pagan Gods then the next minute the Christian come in like new neighbour and start go on like Ned Flanders. Next thing we know our altars are being burned down are were being hunted down like common monsters. I felt Harris Ford in the Fugitive.

Next thing to happen Rome falls and here comes the Dark Ages a time when everyone was ignorent and being control and oppressed. It was like living in a cross between the movies Idoicracy and 1984. I'd like to skip what happened in those years but I'll give you a short summary. Basically I couldn't get laid if my life depened on it, serious the women of the time were pratcically wearing titanium chastity belts. I had to be careful using my powers cause if anyone saw me I'd be called a demon and killed. Ironic huh so called Christian trying to kill an the Archangel Gabriel.


	8. Goodbye Old Friend

Goodbye Old Friend.

After me and Kali broke up I went on the rebound and hooked up with a lot of women, human and goddess. I was with Aphodite, she was a minx, Agni who was hotter than the flames she controlled but this best of all these relationships was with Freya. We were together for 47 years, some of the best years I ever had.

I sometimes wish that I could have loved Freya as much as I loved Kali but sadly I couldn't. I couldn't give either of them the love they deserved. It my fault really, I was never really a team player, I guess no matter how welcomed he is a lone wolf will never really feel like they belong.

Freya and I had a very good relationship, we had something that everyone wish they could have, we were friend and lovers. We spent years slaughter villages with smiles on are face, torturing hunters in fact I remember this one time when a hunter was chasing us for 3 days straight and when he finally caught up with us I grabbed him and squazed his head till his eyeballs popped out and his grey matter sprinkled the ground. Freya was bent double laughing at his suffering and said 'Damn that was hot'. We had some fun right there next to that hunter body.

When we heard about the Crusades we thought it sounded like fun to go they and create some chaos while the Christians and Muslim fought Dad. I tell ya when we were heading there we were like two kids going to Disney Land, only instead of say 'I want to ride the rollarcoaster' we said thing like 'I want to slaughter 1000 Christians'. If I had only knew then I wouldn't have gone.

When we got there Freya couldn't help but laugh at the stupidity of the monotheisises. 'Look at them, they worship the same god but fight over stupid things like his name, at least our followers fought over many gods'. I couldn't help but agree with her. Christian, Jews and Muslims they basically worship the same god but are fighting non-stop over his message, who care if some call him Allah and other call him Yahweh, who cares if some people celebrate Christmas and other celebrate Hanakuh you don't see the Buddhist complaining, I think Buddha was one of the few prophets who got it right.

But this isn't a theology debate it a recount of one of the worse days of my life. It all began in this manor we spent the night after we killed and ate the rich dude in it. We got up a bit sore from the previous night if you catch my drift.

We began walking down the market which looked a lot like the movie Aladdin when suddenly some asshole come up to us shouting in Arabic 'Why is this woman not covered'. We understood what he said because all gods are omnilinguist and Freya got angry and she is worse than the Incredible Hulk when she's angry.

She ripped the fellow in half and next thing you know everyones screaming in fear. Then these the guards show up and worse of all they have stakes which can kill us. Now of course within a few minute they all either dead or crying uncle. But than I realised something was wrong. I turn around and there I see the horrible sight. Freya lying on the ground, dead with a stake in her heart.

I didn't know what to do so I did the only thing I could do, I reset time. I thought that if I turned back the clock I could have a chance to save her. But I was wrong, the first time I did it we killed the guards before they could kill her but then a army of Christians invades the city and she is killed by them. So I reset time again and she died again. Everytime she died I would reset time and everytime I did no matter what I did or how far we teleported away I just could save.

After about a hundred resets I got a visit from an old face that made me realise something. I was craddling Freya's for the 100th time about to rest time when a voice from behind said 'You can't save her, no matter how many time you try'. I turn around and see her. Tessa the reaper from the Great Flood.

'Of course I can all I have to do is learn from the mistakes of the previous times and find a way' I said even though I knew that she was right. 'Do you know how many people over the years have summoned me and my kin and begged us to spare someone they loved, but we can't it not the natural order and I'm going to tell you what we tell them. Sometime you've got to let people go' she said.

I felt sick because I knew she was right and no matter how many time i turned back the clock I couldn't save her and I couldn't resurect with out Big Brother finding me. I decide it would be best to just let her go.

But before that I was going to give her the best day of her life. I reset time to the previous day and treated her to everything she loved. I made her her favourite meals, Roasted Virgin with a side of boar. I took her to France where we burnt down all the churches and monestries we could find. I brought her to the top of Mt. Everest because she always wanted to see the top of the world. Finally we spent the night together in the best house I could find a palace.

The next day we went to the market and just like on the first day she was murdered by the guards because of their misogynistic rules. But some thing was different this day. I let one of them live and took him somewhere private. After a couple of hours of tortures so horrible they'd have Alaister wetting himself I found out who told them about the stake. It was Oor, another god who wanted Freya badly and I guess when she ran off with me he snapped and decide that if he can't have her no one can.

I spent the next few weeks hunting him down and when I finally trapped him I made him pay. Lets not go in to details about what I did to him but let just say a couple of centuries in Hell was like a vacation to the Bahamas compared to Oor's punishment. It was worse then Hostel, Saw and Alaister put together.

_Centuries Later_

I was in this town giving this pust his just deserts, he said he didn't believe in wormholes so I dropped him in one. Then who should show up Telma and Louise otherwise know as Sam and Dean Winchester. I heard about Dean's demon deal and how Sam is desperate to save his big bro so I decided since it was the anniversary of Freya's death I'd teach Sam the same lesson I had to learn 'He got to let people go' and also those idiots tried to kill so this will be a great opportunity for revenge


	9. How to be a Rennaissance Man

How to be a Renaissance Man

In the years following Freya's death and my revenge against Oor, it was a bad time for me, I stopped seeing the fun in my work. I became no more than a business man. It was a dark time for me. I kept replay the moment Freya died in my mind

I was craddling her in my arms as she died slowly. I was begging for something to save her. 'I love you Freya' I said. 'No you don't but thanks for saying' she said dying with a smile on her face.

For years I was completely alone and having no fun , that was until I bumped into Aphodite or Venus as she was know now a days. I met her as she was posing for a painting by Botticella.

'Hey Loki good to see you' she said. 'Oh hey Aphodite' I said ' Love to chat but I have to go'. I didn't want to get close to her. After Freya died I realised something, If I care about other then I'll simply be heartbroken when they die, but if i'm alone I would be heartbroken.

But she was not that easy to get rid of. 'It's actually Venus now' she said 'So what have you been doing with yourself, last I heard you were dating Freya'.I turned and tried to run off cause I didn't want to talk about Freya.

'Hey wait' she said before grabbing me and pulling me back.' What's the matter, did you and Freya break up' she asked. 'Freya's dead, she was killed in the Holy Lands and few years ago' I said nearly unable to speak with sadness.

She sensed my sadness and began to comfort me. 'It's okay' she said. After all these years i could hold in the grief any more and let it out. After hours of grieving and comforting Venus finally spoke.

Loki, you've been grieving long enough, Freya would turn over in her grave if she saw what you've become, where's the old fun loving Trickster that we all know and love' she said. That when it hit me.

She was right, I have lost sight of who I really am, I'm Loki the Trickster, if I'm not having fun then I might as well go back to Heaven. It was about time that I got back to enjoying life.

Venus and I began a very pleasant relationship. She help me get back to being a real Trickster. She became like my sensai, my Mr. Miyagi or Ms. Miyagi. She help me get back into shape.

One of the best things about our relationship was her Libido. She had more Mojo than Austin Powers. As a love god she was always horny and that suited me to a T. We spent half our waking hours in bed and the other half out of bed if you catch my driff. Our relationship was like a porno movie.

I remember the day I found fun again. Venus had found me this woman who date this artist and I tell you she was the bigger Goth than Wednesday Addams. If you asked her about a glass she say it was half empty, and worse of all she made everyone around her pessimistic to. Especially her boyfriend, some artist named Leo. Her name was Lisa.

I decide to give her exactly what she wanted. She never smiled so I made it so if she ever smiled her face would crack like a mirror. Know it took a few month for her to smile. It was long enough for Leo to paint a painting of her, what was it calling the Monning Lisa no the Mona Lisa that was the name.

It was that day that I rediscovered something I lost ,the Eye of the Tiger, I was like Rocky and Venus was my Adrienne or maybe she was Mickey either way I was back on my game and it was all thanks to her.

One of the most important days was the day I learned Lucifer Achille's Heel, a sort of fail safe that exists in case Lucifer escape and Michael died before defeating him.

I was in France during the Black Plague. Most people blame rats and their parasites for the plague that devastated Europe worse than drugs devastated Elvis's life but I knew the truth. Pestilence the Horseman reared his ugly head and infected all of Europe.

I decide to put a stop to the Plague. I caught him in Paris in a port. He was planning to infect the cargo and spread the infect to other countries.

'Hey Chicken Pox' I said' Yeah you heard me you slimely diease carrying Pony rider, I know what your doing so unless you want to end up in a pool of alcohol you hop back on your My Little Pony and take your Bubonic carrying ass back to the Underworld.

'You think I fear you Trickster, the Horsemen fear nothing, not even the Devil himself ' he said holding up his hand to show me his ring 'See this, if Lucifer every gets out and turns against us we can use are ring to put that spoiled brat back on the time out stool'.

'You might not fear the Devil, but you should fear me' I said smiling as I banished him back to Hell. In the next few years the diease died down and Europe was saved. Weird, Alexander Fleming gets rid of Smallpox and he put in the History books and I spot the Black Plague and I get nothing talk about gratitude.

Venus and I dated for most of the Rennaissance. We were all good couple, all fun and games not just in the bedroom but outside it. She was my muse, she help me get over the pain of losing Freya.

We went to see all of Shakespeare's play and I used them for inspiration for some of my Tricks. In fact sometime I would have my victims act out the plays for Venus's enjoyment. She loved Shakespeare.

I miss her , near the end of the Renaissance she ran off with her old flame Hermes. The god of thieves stole my girl. After that I wanted to leave Europe so I decide to join Colombus's crew and set off for the New World (Well not literally Columbus's crew, he was worm food long before I came to America)


	10. New World

The New World

After hoping over the pond the get to America of those coffin ship (they weren't lying about the name, buy a ticket get a headstone free) i settled into the New World. When i got there The Pale Face and the Natives didn't get along, they went at it like Cat and Dogs, it was like watching Avatar except without Aliens.

Anyway i spent the first few years spreading my special brand of fun. Nothing to extreme just a few legands come to life and other stuff. I remember this one person talk about a great big wind bag, he was already full of hot air I just made it real and watched him swell up like that girl in Willy Wonka and watch him float away into the sky.

I remember this woman who was so vain if she was Chocolate she'd eat herself. For her i decided to go the way of Shallow Hal and make it so that she would looked as she was on the inside and let me tell you her inner self made the Wicked Witch of the West look like Jessica Alba. Another there was this big Bully, the guy was an ass so that what i turned him into. But i gave him a second chance, i think i was going soft, i turned back into a human and told him if he ever bullied anyone again I'd turn him back into a Donkey and that time i wouldn't turn him back.

Yep America was fun until George Washington and the Damn Rebellion against the Brits. They expected me to fight, I'm a Lover not a Fighter so I decided to slip back to Europe until one of them said Uncle.

I headed to France. I decide to do what I did with Spartacus and start a rebellion here. Call me crazy but i've always hated monarchy, they think they get their power from God, as if my dad would let dicks like them run a country. I remember Henry the 8th, he wanted a son so badly, I fixed it so he could only have daughters.

I didn't take much just a let push and those Cheese eating surrender monkey (course technical they weren't that at the time) had a full out rebellion and I decided to sit back have a slice of cake and watch as the Bastille was stormed and Louie the 16th had his head cut.

Then off course they kick out they King and bring in someone much worse, Lord Farquaad AKA Napolien. After a a while I decided to send him somewhere out of Europe's hair. I think i sent him to either the Island from Lost, Craggy Island or Treasure Island i'm not sure.

After France I decide to travel around Europe and Asia a little before returning to the New World and it was during this Travel that something great happen. I was traveling around Southern Spain when I came across a village or at least the remains of a village, the entire place had been massacre, destroyed a burnt to the ground and the villagers had been eaten, i think about 3 people survived it.

I went to the Church which was the only building still intact and in there I saw the person who had done this. That radiate, breathtaking, otherworld beauty whose name was forever branded on my heart, Kali.

"Loki, I should have known you'd come, after all wherever their is chaos you go there like bacteria infecting a wound" she said without looking at me instead she was staring intensely at the crucifix on the wall. "Lovely to see you too Kali" I said "So what did this village do to deserve a massacre". "One of the villagers looked at me the wrong way" she replied.

"These Fools, when I attacked came running here praying to their God for help and what happened, they were slaughter like lamb by a real God" she said smiling proudly. "You know there's something that always confused me about Christianity" i said

"Besides the Idea of a single God" she said. "Yeah, see Christian believe that Jesus will come again and if he does don't they think he'll be a little offended by the fact that his follower worship the image of him dying" i asked.

"You speak of this religion as if it was actually true, it can't be true" she said "Why can't it be true after all, there are people who say we don't exist and yet we do" I said.

"If their God did exist and he was as Powerful and Benevelent as they believ he is then he could has stopped me, there for either he doesn't exist, he isn't powerful or he doesn't care" she explained walking over to the stainglass windows, I followed her.

"And these ridiculous creatures as if they could exist" she said refering to the images of Angels and Archangels in the window "Michael the protector of the weak, did he protect these people from my wrath" she said shattering the very andogynous stainglass image of Michael and moved on to the next one.

"Raphael the healer, did he heal all the people i killed" she said before shattering that image(which by the way was the wrong race, why do Christians think everyone in the Bible is white)

"And finally Gabriel the messenger, did he come and warn, these people of their inpending doom" she said shattering the stainglass image of yours truely before turning her attention back to the cross.

I picked up one of the broken piece and looked at it. It was an image of my face. Kali was right, I didn't warn these people of there deaths, but how could, I didn't know. She was right, how could me and my Archangel bretheren be called all powerful when we don't do anything. How can Michael have the title protector of the weak when he's never protected any human from anything, how can Raphael be called a healer when all he does is leave his vessel braindamaged, he a real . I may a killer but a least I care about Humanity unlike my family.

Kali arms where suddenly engulfed in flames and she fireblasted the crucifix. "Where's there Messiah now" she said. In a fit of anger at my useless family I joined her in destroying the Church. I blasted the Bible with Lightning from my hand and said "So much for the Good Book"

We set that entire church on fire and watched it burn and as the flames of the church died the Fire of are love was rekindled.


	11. Wild, Wild, West

The Wild Wild West

Well after torching the Church and having our little religious debate me and Kali had some for the next several decades messing with thigh ass Puritans and dodging hunter. We were like Bonnie and Clyde. That was until we picked up another god.

We rescued him before he got killed by bunch of hunters. I remember what Kali said "I suppose he can stay, he can be our pet". His name was Njord. He travel with us to France and how does he repay me for everything i did for him he pulls a Judas a stakes me in the fricking hearts, stuffs me in a coffin and sends my pseudo corpse to the New World. Later on i heard that he told Kali hunters killed, tries to kill me and steal my girl, how Shakespearean.

I spent a month in that damn coffin on my way to America, After that i knew how Dracula feels. When i got out of my coffin i found myself in the Wild West. Brothel, whiskey and shootouts ever five minute, their was plenty to keep me entertained.

In the old west i got a job as a bounty hunter. Back then my favourite words were 'Dead or Alive' so has you can imagine these Billy the Kids and Jesse Jameses were more dead than Lohan's career. I remember how i use to introduce myself, I'd run my nails along a chalkboard like in Jaws and say "I am the man with no name, Luke Coyote at your service". I know, i know lame alias but it work.

I was the fastest gun in the west, I put Lee Marvin and Clint Eastwood to shame. But it was in the Old West where i nearly met my doom. It was in 1841, i had just finished killing some bandits when a hunter on horseback comes out of no where and points a gun at me.

"I know who you are" he said "Or should i say what you are". "Then you should know that a gun is about as useful against me as a stake is against a vampire" I said "Know didn't your mother ever teach you it rude to kill someone before you tell them your name"

"Name's Campbell, William Campbell, and this gun ain't no ordinary gun, you ever hear of the Samuel Colt's legendary Colt he made on the night of the Alamo when Haley's comet was in the sky, it has the power to kill anything and he gave it to a hunter worthy of having such a weapon" he said proudly.

"How'd you get your hands on it then" I said sarcasticly. "Oh i'm going to enjoy putting something like you 6 feet under" he said smiling like Uriel during a war. He took the gun and shot me or at least what he thought was me.

My clone convulsed and a sort of electricity spread from the bullet wound till it fell to ground dead. "Ha, Ha, Ha" he laughed and headed off. After a few minute i came out from my hiding spot and examined my dead clone. Isn't that interesting. Something tells me that gun going to be important in the future.


	12. World War One

WW1

After the my adventures in the West I headed to Canada and had some fun their for a couple of decades. It wasn't until 1914 that thing got interesting. I had heard about the War in Europe so I decided to back there and mess around a little.

I hoped on a big ship The Empress of Ireland it was called and it was their that I found the girl of my dreams. It was at night when the ship was leaving Canada. I came out for some fresh air and that when I saw her. Kali in all divine glory.

"Evening beautiful" I said to her. "Not Interes, Loki" she said surprised "I thought you were dead, Njord told me you were killed by hunters". "I expected he told you that after all he's the Benadict Arnold who tried to Kill me" I said. " How did you survive? " she asked. "Well let just say Njord isn't exactly Harvard material" I said.

"Hey Kali, I got you a drink" Njord said as he appeared. Seeing me alive and well talking to Kali he dropped the drink at looked like he was about to pull a Roadrunner but Kali was too quick for him and next thing he knew he was being strangled and held over the edge of the ship.

"Why, did you kill Loki and then Lie to me about it" she asked. "Please don't" he begged. "Do you know what was once the punishment for those who lied to me, they were tied to horses and dragged through fields of spikes for 10 miles before being hung by there own intestines" she said smiling.

"Please have mercy " he choked. "Very well, because you have been an amusing pet I will show mercy" she said before breaking his neck and dropping him into the sea. "That poor SOB, he's sleeping with the fishes" I said glad to be rid of that dick.

"I grow sick of this ship, destroy it and take me to Europe the proper way" she said. "Alright then hop in the Life boat" I said. We hop on the life boat got out to sea and a abracadbra later the ship was surrounded by fog and was going down faster than the Titanic.

Kali laughed and said "You always knew how to amuse me Loki". "Thanks" I said. After that well lets just say we turn that life boat into the Love Boat. After that me and Kali teleported to Europe and began to carnage.

We started small, we had to pace ourselves after all we had the whole war to fight. I never felt much guilt over doing it after all the Humans may be good but they give in to easily to things like anger and violence. So me and Kali slaughter any random army we came across, British, Germany even Russia.

During this period we bumped into War of course Kali didn't even see the Horsemen for what he was. To me on the other hand he stuck out like a sore thumb. Normally I would send him pack back to Hellville but Kali was like a kid in a candy store during the war it if ended so soon it would have broken her heart and I couldn't do that to her.

Any way we were in Russia during the end of the war and that when we had a fight and went are seperate ways. I remember it like it was yesterday. She had gone out to get something or someone to eat and when she came back she began to pack a left me. She said she had grown sick of my company and left. And me I went out and on impulse funded the Communist party with millions. Lenin could now buy the new vodka he wanted so badly.

It took me many years to realise why Kali left me but to this day I can't figure out how she found out I was an Angel.

_How Kali Found Out the Truth._

Gabriel may never know how Kali found out but you will. Kali was out looking around the destroyed remains of Russia. The landscape was littered with bodies but Kali was looking for someone alive to eat. She noticed something moving out of the corner of her eye and just in time to see the black smoke enter a corpse.

The dead body returned to life and It's eyes turned yellow. He smiled and looked at Kali and said "Howdy M'am". "How dare you demon" she said "What makes you think an a disgesting maggot like you is even worthy to look apon a Goddess". The Demon smiled and said "Now, Now, manners, you'll hurt my feelings".

"Be gone from ny sight Demon before I destroy you" she said summoning fire to her hand. "You've got spunk, I like that in a woman. Kali was furious at the Demon disrespect for her and blasted him with fire. Instead of hitting it's target the flame were redirected.

"Interesting, so your a bit more powerful than the average demon" Kali said. "Your right about that but it doesn't a powerful demon like me to see your traveling with a fraud" The Demon said. "What do you mean" she asked.

"Your boyfriend, he not what he seems, he's a wolf in sheep's clothing or maybe a lion in wolf's clothing would be more accurate" he said. "If he's not a trickster then what is he" she asked.

"He's an Angel" the demon said. "Nonsense, those winged creature in church window they don't exist, their just something made up to give people that there something that can protect them" she said.

"Oh their no fairy tale believe me" he said. "How would you even know this" she asked. "Simply Demons can see other spiritual beings like Ghost, Reaper and Angel and your boy toy he shines like a star underneath his meatsuit" he said smilingly.

Kali was angry now and shouted "You lie". She Charged at the Yellow-Eyed Demon but was too late it left it host. How could he have lied to her for all these years, to all of them. He must be a spy for Heaven

'_He made me fall in love with him just to spy on the true gods, I will spare his life this one time but i'm leaving" _she thought heading back to their room.


	13. How the War was Really Won

How the War was Really Won

Not many people know this but I single handedly led to the downfall of Adolf Hitler and the Nazis thus securing the Allies victory in the War. Its an interesting story but to tell it i would have to go back to the crucifixation. Yes sir I bet you that when Christ was being nailed to the cross and put up for the night he wasn't thinking "This moment will create a powerful weapon that centuries later would be used by a deranged psychopath to start the biggest war ever"

Nah he was thinking "You know I can see my house from up here". Well that what happened see as Jesus was dying on the Cross the Roman got impatient, they didn't want to miss their soaps so a Roman soldier shanked Jesus in the side with his spear.

You've all heard the story of the Holy Grail, you know the whole The Last Crusade thing, take one drink out of it and your Dorien Gray. Very few people have heard of the Holy Lance. Its also know as the Spear of Destiny and they say that the Spear tip used to stab Jesus is blessed and anyone who possesses it become invincible.

All you have to do is pick it up and its goodbye Clark Kent , hello Superman. Anyway enough with the Fairy Tales as you can image something like that has passed hands for centuary ever Atilla the Hun and Genghis Khan in the world wanted it and it has a long and bloody history. That little knife has a bigger body count then The Friday the 13th series.

Eventually it made its way back to Rome. However after that dumbass Mussolino joined forces with that blowhard Hitler he gave it to him as a birthday present. With that weapon Hitler was able to conquer nearly all of Europe, until I step in.

I figured after he started his whole ethnic cleansing thing he needed to be taken down a peg or to. So I travel to the center of Naziville and snuck into The Fortest of Death and robbed The Emperor blind. I stole his kagic dagger right under his mustached face. After that came the turning point in the Battle of Britain and 3 years later the allies won.

If your wondering what I did with the Lance I sold it to a young boxer many years later named Cassius Clay and I heard he had quite a career.

Now I'd like to take you back to just before the war. 1939 one of the best years ever because of the movie that came out that year. The Wizard of Oz. It one of my favourite films of all time.

I remember the first time i saw i immediately created everything in a town. I turned people into Munchins, talking trees, flying monkeys and of course Dorothy, the Scarecrow, the Tin Man, the Cowardly Lion and the Wicked Witch.

I had them play out the whole movie for my amusement. They still brings a smile to my face.

After WWII went back to America and had some fun in the 50's. It brought about the rise of Teenagers and a whole bunch of douche bag Biff Tannans who needed me to teach them a lesson. I was hardly bored.

Most people don't know that I inspired one of the coolest and most famous TV characters of all time. It all happened in a diner one day when I was getting a burger.

There was this kid on a date with a girl completely out of his league. He was a 4 and she was an 8 or 9 easy. Don't know how he convinced her to go out with him but she did.

Anyway I came into the diner and ordered a burger. I saw he was having trouble with the Juke Box and his date wanted to dance and was getting impatient.I felt sorry for him and decided to help. "Stupid Machine" he said. "Need a hand " I asked as I came over. "Are you a repairman" he asked. "No" I said hitting the machine while using my powers to start it up "Just a magician".

The juke box played Earth Angel as the kids danced and the girl looked like she was having fun. At the end they were leaving but he said "I'll be out in a minute". The girl went to his car and waited. He came up to me and said "Thanks man, you saved my date I own you one".

"Don't mention it" I said. I looked at her and then at him and said "No offense but how does a guy like you end up with a girl like that, did you hypnotise her or something?". He smiled and said "No, she told me that its because I'm the only guy she can count on and that means something to her".

"She's going to be your wife" I said. "You think so" he asked. "I know so" I said. "Thanks man, I'm Jesse Delamotte" he said. "I'm Arthur Fonzarelli" I said using my alias.

He headed out to his car but from the diner i saw trouble coming in the form of a gang of Bullies starting to haress him and his girl. I decided to even the odd and used my ability to Popeye the kid up. He showed them and it saved me the trouble.

I watched him drive off with the impressed girl and something told me His life was about to go uphill.


	14. Welcome to the 60's

Welcome To The 6O's

Ah the 60's a time of peace, love and hippies so out of their drug addled minded that i could use my ability in public. It also brought about one of my favourite sources of inspiration, TV and Movies. The Biggest source during that decade was The Twilight Zone

That was great a show. I loved it the evil talking doll and the little kid with god-like powers. I remember after each weeks episode I would try and recreate it in my weekly prank on someone. Some of them worked well like this one fellow who beat his daughter so i sent her a Talking Tina doll and lets just say he got his comeupence.

But one of the things i loved most about the 60's was mini skirts, damn if their isn't a way to make women hotter i haven't heard it. It was in the beginning of the 60's that i found out what happened to all the money I gave the Communist Party in my depressed state deacdes ago, it was used to build the Berlin Wall.

Of course that the thing that i loved best about that deacade was the King of Rock and Roll, Elvis Presley. I remember how I went to one of his concerts in Los Vegas. I remember what happened like it was yesterday. He was on the stage singing.

"Your the Devil in Disguise, oh yes you are"

"I thought that i was in Heaven"

"But I was sure surprised"

"Heaven help me i didn't see the devil in your eyes"

It was noe of the best moments of my life when i snuck backstage and asked him for an autograph. "Excuse could i have your autograph" i asked. "Of course, who do I make it out to " Elvis asked.

"To Gabriel" I said. He wrote of the picture of him_ 'To my Friend Gabriel signed The King of Rock and Roll, Elvis Presley'. "_Thank you, thank you very much" i said so happy to get the autograph. "Thank you, Thank you very much, tha's a catchy phrase mind if I borrow it" he asked

"Be my guest" I said before leaving. After that i did what i do best, bring some equlity to the world. For as long as i've been around the Old White Guys have been in charge, i think it's time that they share their power with the other kid otherwise it's timeout for them.

So I caused a few rebellion such the rise of Feminisism and African American rights, in fact i was there when Martin Luther King made his "I have a dream " speech. It was very moving.

Now I remember the day that I met two of best hunter in history just the fact that they went after me and survived is a testiment to their skill. It was when i was Halloween 1966. I had decided to pull one of my best ideas ever.

I turned people into their costumes. I was hilarious, vampires, werewolves, Frankenstains, zombies and a few 007s. Anyway I was sitting down enjoying the chaos when this Guy come at me with stakes.

He lunge at me but I send him falling with Telekinesis. "What gives man, you go around trying to kill everyone with stakes, i'd be surprised if you had any friends" I said.

"I don't want to be friends with something like you, see I know what you are" he said. "A Libra" I said sarcasticly. "Your funny, I guess that all yuo kind are joker, I know what you are, there only one type of creature powerful enough to do what you've done here and in all the city in your trail, Your a Trickster" he said.

"Buzz, oh I'm sorry but that is not the correst answer, you do not win the million doller prize, thanks for playing" I said about to finish him off but felt something dig into my back. The guy got up and said "Do you think i came only"

"Nice going Honey " he said to the woman who just staked me. "Your welcome Samuel" she said pushing my dead clone on the ground. They looked around as i undid my mojo to make them think i was dead. "Let go check on Mary, Deana" Samuel said before they headed off.

As they left I walked out from behind a tree a thought '_Hunters, you'd think they know when someones playing posesum'_. I decided to follow them in diguise. They lead me to a motel where i looked in and saw them unchain a little girl in a witch costume. No doubt she must have been effected by my Hocus Pocus and went all Sabrina.

I could have gone in there and smited with all my might but I don't kill children and the thought of leaving that little girl an orphan it was just to heartbreaking so I let them live, i must be going soft in my old age.

They soon left the town as did I making sure to go the opposite direction.


	15. That 70's Chapter

That 70's Chapter

The 70's the disco how i miss it. Back then I was the hottest thing on the dance floor. When they played Disco Inferno I burnt the place down literally. But it also has the happened to be the decade when someone actually tricked me.

It all happened one day in in 1971. I was getting up for another day of fun when I saw the calender. It was the anniversory of the day I first met Kali. I hadn't seen her in decades and yet just remembering that day was killing me. But it also inspired me and i wrote a song about her.

That night i went to a kareoke bar and sang.

"I remember all my life"

"Raining down as cold as ice "

"Shadow of a man, a face through a window"

Crying in the night, the night goes into morning"

"Just another day, happy people pass my way"

"Looking in there eyes, i see a memory"

"I never realised how happy you made me"

" Oh Kali, well you came and gave without taking"

"But I sent you away, oh Kali"

"You kissed me a stopped from shaking "

"And I need you today ,Oh Kali"

After that I got a round of appalse and went to get a drink when this guy came up to me at the bar. "That was great song you sang, did you write it yourself" he asked "Yep" I said. "So, who's Kelly" he asked.

"Kali" I corrected. "Weird name, is she Hindu or something" he said. "Go away " I said getting annoyed at him "Look i'm sorry if i hit a sore subjet, I'm Scott, Scott English, Let me buy you a beer" he said then asking the waitress for two beers.

"So what's your name". " Jacob Fox" I replied. The waitress gave us are beers "Thank you Mandy" Scott said looking at her name tag. Anyway we got drunk and next thing i now i wake up and the lyrics to my song are gone along with Scott.

Few years later i hear Barry Manilow on the radio singing a song about a girl called Mandy and it has the exact same lyrics as my song.

That's not the first time someone stole something from we. One day I was watching TV and i flick on to Happy Days and I see a character who's name and move are the exact same as mine in the diner all those years ago.

It was also during this that I had some fun in the sun. During the summers following 1975 i would go to the beaches and keep an eye out for Beach Bullies. I thank Steven Spielburg for giving me this great idea.

I would wait for them to go out for a swim and then I would create a giant shark like from Jaws to snack on them. Good times. But that wasn't the only movie that inspired me their was the Exorcist, Grease and Star Wars.

I remember when I first saw Grease i turn an entire town into a giant musical for a few days. But i got the surpirse of my life when I went to see A New Hope.

It happened when it ended and i was waking home when i see this couple in front of me and I notice the bracelet on her hand. She was a hunter. I had to find out if they were hunting me so i telekinetically slid it off her wrist picked it up and said "Excuse miss you dropped your bracelet"

They turn around and I recognise the girl right away she may be a decade older but their was no doubt about it she was Mary Campbell the little from Halloween 1966. As for her boy toy I recognised him but he was not a hunter, he was a vessel. He was Michael's meatsuit. Thank god I'm Big Brother blind spot but still let hope Michael doesn't have to pop in to this worl to get some milk at the store.

"Thank you" she said taking it back but satring at me with hatred in her eyes, she recognised me. "Do I know you" John asked "You look familar". "I just have one of those face, some people say I look like Henry Winkler". John smiled at the comment and Mary faked a smile to keep up the facade. "Honey I think I left my purse in the cinema" she said

"I'll go get it" he said running off to get it. As soon as he was out of sight Mary turn emotions were revealed and I saw the anger in her face "What the hell do you think your doing" she said pissed. "What do you mean" I said sounding more innocent then a 6 year old girl scout.

"Don't think I don't recognise the same Trickster my Parents killed over ten years ago, how did you survive" she asked. "Your kidding right, do you know how many hunters i've put down in my time, the real question is how they survived" i said. "Don't think that just cause i'm out of the hunting game that i wouldn't hesitate to put a stake through your heart"

"Please like you'd last a second against me" I said "How about a compromise, you go home with Lover boy and I skip town and we never have to see each other again deal" I said. I saw all a cavelcade of emotions run across her face as she made her decision. "Honey" John said coming out of the cinema. "Deal" she said very silently.

"Are you Ok" John asked coming over. I checked my watch and said "Is that the time I late for my Hair appointment" before heading off.

That would be the last I saw of Mary Winchester but not the last I'd see of John Winchester.


	16. Back to the 80's

Back To The 80's

The 80's was one of my favourite decades. It has tons of my favourite things, shades, pac-man, movie. Yep what I wouldn't give to have that decade go on forever but all good thing most come to an end.

Back then i loved Slasher movies. I remember that everytime i saw a new one i would recreate with some of the victims. Like this one time their was this bully at a high school, let just say he had a run in with a certain dream killer by the name of Freddy Kruger.

One of the greatest day in my life hapen in 1985 but I think in order to tell it i'd have to go back 9 months to the night of the fallen star. That right a star fall in Kentucky and it sure as hell wasn't Claire Danes. Also i sensed something else that night a presence i hadn't sensed in a long time.

Any way after nine months of orgies and fun i went to a hospital in Ohio and popped into the hospital and glamoured myself into a doctor. It was there i saw her again after thousands of years. My best friend in Heaven, God's little Power Ranger, Anna and she was in diapers.

I picked her up and said "Why Anna, you've got to give me the of your plastic surgeon, you look 2000 younger". The little baby smiled as i picked her up and I wondered if this little rugrat even remembered me from Heaven.

"Excuse me Doctor" said a nurse from behind me" Mr and Ms Milton would like to see their daughter". I brought her to Mr and Ms Touched by an Angel. "Hi I'm Dr. House" I said introducing myself to them.

They began to hold their child and fell in love with her insistly. "So she okay Doctor" her father asked. "Healthy as horse" I said. "It took us so long to coceive we were afraid we'd never have children" she said. "Well looks like an angel was looking out for you two" I said.

"So what should we name her" she asked. "I don't know" he said. "You know Anna's a nice name" I suggested. "Yeah Anna, It suits her" they said. Later that day I marked her with an enochian sigil. It was powerful enough to keep her off Heaven or Hell radar unless they are looking for her. That way i'd be able to find her.

After my little stint in ER i had a run in with a famous hunter. I was messing about at some high school when i had my run in with him.

It was after final bell and i was their getting the lay of the land to plan to mess with it. I heard someone behind me and could see him hiding . I ignored him and pretend to be distracted. he run at me stake in hand but i pinned him to the wall telekinetically and picked up the stake about to stick it in his heart but stop just as it hit the skin.

"That's it, your not even going to fight back" I said. He seemed confused by what i said. "What's your name?" I asked. "John Winchester" he said. "Tell me John Winchester are you a greenhorn?" I asked. "What "he said cofused. Figures, he's a greenhorn.

"How long you been Hunting monsters" I asked. "2 years" he said. "And let me guess, you killed a few ghost, maybe a wendigo or two" I asked. "Yes" he said. "Gess your hardly a toddler by hunter standards" I said. "Do you know how many hunters i've killed, let me put it to you this way, in hunter circles i'm called the Terminator"

He seemed confused at what I was telling him. I let him go and he fall to the ground and i kneed down next to him "Do you have any Kids" I asked. He didn't answer. "I'll take that as a yes, go spend some time with them, find yourself a Yoda to teach you more about hunting and when you're all grown up and become a full flegded Jedi try again to kill me" I said as I teleported him back to the motel he was staying.

I wouldn't see John Winchester for a long time after that.


	17. 1990's

1990's

Well that was a decade when i did some of my most interesting tricks. I was a big simpson fan so I turned an entire town into Springfield and the people in it to the characters from the show. I made the Simpsons, Flanders, Moe and Barney and Apu and Mr. Burns and Smithers and lived in some of my favourite episode like the prohibition one were Homer becomes the Beer Baron or the one were Bart, Milhouse(Or Nerdhouse as I call him) Nelson and Martin go on a road trip.

I was also a Buffy fan, sometimes i would make a copy of Buffy for a night to stake her so to speak. Any way i also would draw inspiration from the monster in that show to punish some of my victims like those creepy Gentlemen things.

But even Trickster need a vaction so when ever I got bored with my job I use my powers and take a vaction to the sunny shores of Baywatch. It was all home made. The sexy lifeguards, sexy surfers. Boy that Pamela Anderson and me had some good times.

I also had my stoies to watch Dawson's Creek and Saved By the Bell oh I love those Kids. If my brother were anything like them Heaven would be an even better place.

But i did do something important. Remember me saying i particully paid for the Berlin Wall to be built well i was one of the people who tore it down. I remember it there was this idiot in front of me hitting the wall with slegdehammer and barely making a dent in the wall

"Give me that you noodle armed choirboy" I said and grabing it out of his arm and hit the wall and did some serious damage to it.

Then came the rise in popular of video games. I was a big arcade fan and being able to play games at home. I remember i even made a giant video game world and i trapped some hunter in it. It was game over for them.

But you know underneath my Trickster facade i'm kind of an overprotective big brother which is why I did what I did in Ohio. I was passing through and I decided to check up on my little sister Anna.

I saw her in school and she was about 14. I go there and what I saw really pissed me off. Their was this little prick bullying Anna. Oh that bastard is going to regret the day he was born when i got through with him.

After the school I followed him home where I put my revenge plan into action. When he was alone I appear in his house and said "Hey idiot, you think it's fun to bully innocent girl". "Yeah it is, so what are you going to do about you geezer" he said arrogently.

"Oh I was hoping you'd say something like that you arrogent dick" i said snapping my finger and sending him to a pocket dimension i created. It a place where nightmare and fears become reality. And he's never getting out of their.


	18. The Truth

The Truth

John Winchester was heading into the town of Hill Valley, Texas after hearing from Missouri that the answers to his questions would be found there. It seemed to good to be true, after all these years, he would finally know what killed Mary, what killed Sam's girlfriend Jess. He had report that the town seemed to stop communicating with the outside world 3 days ago and people have disappeared around there.

He pulled up into the town and looked around. Sure enough nobody was there. It was the middle of the day and yet no one was the and the store were deserted. He heard a sound coming from the bar. It sound like music. He walked up to it and opened the door.

The second he walked in he was more surprised by what he saw than anything he had ever seen hunting. He had walked into an old fashion bar like out of a western, in fact the everything in the place looked like it was from a western. Even the people looked like they belonged in The Good, The Bad and The Ugly.

It was then that noticed his clothes change. He was know dressed in a Sheriff's get-up. He looked like one of the Village People. He even had a bagde that said Sheriff on it. This was to freaky he was heading out. When he walked out of the bar he saw it wasn't just the bar that was Western themed the entire town had suddenly become a Clint Eastwood movie.

He had back into the the tavern and went up to the bar. "Afternoon Sheriff, what will you have" The Bartender asked. "Just a really strong whiskey" john said. As the bartender was pouring it out John asked "Have their been any weird death lately". "None that I know of" The Bartender replied handing him his drink. "How about any fires" he asked. "Nope" he replied.

John was confused, if the Yellow Eyed Creature wasn't here then why did Missouri send him there. Apart from the fact that the Town had been sucked into the Twilight Zone, maybe it was here, Damn this must be even more powerful than he thought to warp reality of an entire town but it did help narrow the list of what type of creature it could be.

John was about to take a drink of whiskey when he was interrupted by someone who just kicked the door open and shouted at him "Hey McFly, Thought I told you never to come in here". John turned aroud surprised and confused as he he looked at the door and saw an almost Stereotypically looking Western criminal accompined by a rather skinny and stupid looking accomplice.

Seeing John face the man said "You ain't that no good, law loving Seamus McFly, you look like him through specially with the dog ugly Sheriif's hat" The accomplice laughed a very stupid sounding laugh as the man asked "You must be the new Sheriff". "WHO BET I CAN'T BREAK MY RECORD OF RUNNING THIS WUSSY EXCUSE FOR A SHERIFF OUT OF TOWN" he shouted.

"Who the hell are you" John asked. "I'm Dirty Dan and this idiot's my sidekick Pinhead Larry" he said "Hey you're not Dirty Dan I am" Larry said. "Shut up you idiot I'm Dirty Dan " Dan said. "I'm Dirty Dan" Larry said. "I'm Dirty Dan" Dan said. "I'm Dirty Dan" Larry said. There arguement was interupted by a whiskey bottle exploding that turned everyones attention to the stranger standing at the threashhold with a smoking gun in his hand.

John could believe his eyes. Now it all made sense, there only one creature powerful enough to manipulate reality like this, it had to be a Trickster. Ang low and behold the very same Trickster John had failed to kill almost 20 years ago was standing there right in front of him. He couldn't believe that the Trickster had killed Mary. The M.O didn't match a Trickster but Missouri had sent him here so that mean the Trickster had to be the one he was after.

"Which one of you Fellas is the real Dirty Dan" he said. "He is" said Larry quickly pointing a finger at Dan. Before he could do anything the Trickster pulled the trigger and Dan was dead. This was his chance, all he need was a stake which was pretty much the leg of his stool and the blood of a victim which he just had.

"Alright Pinhead now you get yours" he said point the gun Larry. He ran up the stairs and the Trickster felloed him. John seeing his chance broke off the leg of his stool and dipped it in Dan's blood. He heard a gun shot upstair and the Trickster came down the stair " Sorry about the mess Sheriff" he said to John.

Seeing his chance John took the stake and tried to stab the Trickster in the Heart but the Trickster throw John across the room Telekinetically. "Geez I know you don't like Bounty Hunter but this is taking it a little to far" he said as he pinned John to the wall telekinetically. "Why you do it" he asked angrily.

"What you mean Dirty Dan, he was the Henry Potter of this town, another month and all these people would have been on the street "the Trickster said. "You killed my wife" John shouted. "What are you talking about I didn't kill your wife" he said

"Don't lie to me you Yellow Eyed Son of a Bitch" John said. "Did you say Yellow Eyed " He said. Know it all made sense to Gabriel. He realised John who fell on the floor. "Just like last time huh, get up you and I have thing to talk about" he said.

The Trickster sat at the bar and John sat next to him. "Two whiskeys " he asked the Bar man. "First off, stop trying to kill me alright it never succeed, you ever watch Looney Toons I'm Bugs Bunny your Elmer Fudd get it" he said drinking his whiskey. "Secondly I can help you get your revenge" he said.

"Why would you help me" John asked. "Well surprisingly not all monster like each other beside I got a score to settle with old Yellow Eyes" he said. "What do you mean" John asked. "That Prick cost me my girlfriend, don't know how he did it but all i know is that when she broke up with me he was in the area, coincodence I think not" he said.

So what do you know about it" John asked. "I know that his Yellow Eyes aren't from Liver Failure he's a Demon" he said. "But Demon have black eyes" John said "Low level ones do but powerfuls one have different coloured eyes" he explained.

"How powerful is this Demon exactly" John asked "Let me out it to you this way, you don't get much higher than him without reaching Lucifer" He said with a strange almost sad look in his eyes.

"This thing got a name?" John asked. "Yep Azazel" He said "Azazel" John repeated "What did he want with Mary" John asked "Nothing Mary just happened to be there" he said "You mean" John started. "That right Sam was his target that night" The Trickster finished before having a third glass of whiskey.

"What does he want with Sam then" John asked. "Sam is Special, not in a Forrest Gump special, in a Damien from the Omen special" he said. "What?" John said. "You know of Sam abilities" he asked. "Yeah Missouri told me" John said. "He didn't get them from a radioactive spider or eating all his vegatables, he got them from Demon blood" The Trickster said

"Why?" John said. "Azazel is planning to open a door way to Hell but you see this doorway is protected can't get near it, but human given abilities by Demon blood can, that what he's planning with Sam and the others" The Trickster said.

John needed a moment to take all this in and drank his whiskey. "How do i kill it, i never found a way to kill a demon" John asked. "Well there is one thing i know of the could kill Azazel, the Colt" he said.

"What" John said. "You know the old Hunter legend, the magic gun that can kill any thing" he said. "Yeah i heard about it and i've net about a dozen who claim to have it" John said skeptically. "Well it's real and if you want to find it ask you old friend Daniel Elkins" he said.

"How do you know it's even exists" John asked. "Cause i got shot with it" he said. "Yet your still alive" John said. "You forget I'm a lot smarter than any hunter out there". They finished their whiskeys and the the trickster turned to John and said "Good Luck" before snapping his fingers.

The next thing John knew he was back in his car and the town had return to normal. He now knew what he had to do, first he had to find out if the Trickster was telling the truth and if he was then he may he just given John the one thing he had wanted for 22 years, Hope.


	19. Reunited

Reunited

So this was it ,The Apocalypse. Huh guess it happened early than the Mayans guess it time to live like their's no tommorrow cause odds are their wouldn't be.

It was during this time that i sensed something, a burst of angelic energy i knew what it was. Anna, she must have retrieved her grace and lost her human body.

I can fix that. I remade her body from scratch and summoned her to it. She enter her empty vessel and was asleep for a while. I looked at her sleeping and i remembered all the good times we used to have in Heaven.

He remember one day when they were in the garden "Gabriel, what's God like?" she asked me. "God's well, he indescribable, he's powerful, more powerful than Michael and he's perfect and beautiful even more beautiful then Lucifer and he's got a great sense of humor" I said. "Really" she said. "Yeah take the platypus for example" i said.

She smiled and laughed. "Why do you think nobody but the Archangels have seen him" She asked. "Cause he's ugly" I said. "Seriously Gabriel, why is that" she said after laughing. "I don't know, maybe he just like his privacy" I said.

Just as i was begining to feel nostalgic Anna began to steer and slowly awoke. "Well,well, well, Sleeping Beauty's finally awake" I said. "Who the hell are you" she said angrily getting up and preparing to defend herself.

"Relax, it will take a minute for you to recognise me, I'm an old friend" I said. Anna looked at me for a second confused but then she recognised me and said "Oh my God, Gabriel It's you". She ran over and gave me a hug. "Where have you been?" she asked.

"It's a long story" I said before telling Anna my life story, how I left Heaven and hid on Earth, how I assumed the identity of Loki the Trickster, my realationship with Kali, all the tricks i pulled and my interaction with The Winchesters and the Campbells.

She in turned told me How she fell from Grace, her human life, and how she reobtained her grace and that was it. After that we sat in silence fr a long time . I remember another good memory from Heaven.

"Gabriel" she said "Why do you think angel can't love the way Humans love". "Is this about that Pretty Boy Castiel" I said. "No, I just wondering" she said embarassed. "I seen the way look at him, it like watching a Teen Drama" I said.

"I don't know what that means. I remembered that even Angels as powerful as Anna can't see the future so I just said "You'll understand soon, anyway Castiel is a complete Tool" I said. "He is not" She said. "What do you see in him" I asked. "I don't know but when i see him i get this nice warm feeling inside me" she said.

"It's probably just gas" I joked "But it could be love, he's the Chachi to your Joanie".

I was pulled out of my Flashback when Anna broke the silence and asked "Why did you leave Heaven?". "Got bored" I said. "Be serious Gabriel why did you leave?" She asked again.

"Don't pretend like you don't know, you remember what it was like up there after Lucifer fell, nobody was getting along and i was sick of living in an episode of Malcolm in the Middle so I left and I showed you the escaped button in case you wanted to join me among the humans, it's funny you and me were like two rich kid who ran off to live on the wrong side of the tracks" I said.

"Do you know what happened after you disappeared, Human haters like Zachariah and Uriel took over, Michael and Raphael didn't do anything to stop it cause they didn't care and any Human Sympathisers were put down" she explained

"Why didn't you do something about it" I asked. "I tried but i have no authority over Zachariah and when he found out that such a high ranking angel sympathised with Humans he did everything in his power to undermine me" she said " Without you people were to afraid to stand up to Zachariah"

"Me" I said surprised. "Yeah, when you were around people saw how an Archangel shared their beliefs and it gave them courage"

"I sorry" I said. "If you weren't happy with how heaven was being run then why didn't you tell God or Michael about it" she asked. "Because if i did that i would be question them and Michael wuld kill me" i said. "Maybe but at least you would have died for a good cause rather than just run off to earth" she said.

"You have no right to say that, you did the same thing" I said. "My reasons were different than yours, I wanted to be human, you did it because your a coward". "How can you say that" I asked. "Because you are, your to much of a coward to stand up to Michael and the others and say This isn't right, this isn't what God wants"

"How do you even know what God wants" I asked. "Because, he wouldn't want this" she said turning around and heading to the door. "Where are you going" I asked. "I'm going to help the Winchesters because unlike you I'm not afraid to fight for what's right, so go back and play your little games and tricks" she said before teleporting away leaving me alone with my thoughts.


	20. Final Message

Final Message

Kali sat in the back of the Impala as the Winchester brother watched the DVD that Gabriel gave to them on Sam's labtop. She couldn't believe it, Gabriel their no way he could have defeated Lucifer, he was dead. _'He was a lier and he got what he deserved'_ she thought. She couldn't believe he lied to them all these centuries, lied to her.

All so he could spy on them. '_But if he was a spy why protect me from Lucifer'_ she thought. She was so confused, she hated him for what he was and lying about it for all those year but she couldn't deny the heartbreak she felt from his death.

She looked at the brothers who stop watching the DVD and began to talk. She wonder what was going to happen with them. If they tries and kill her she reduce them to ash before they can even blink. Dean then looked back at the DVD and then walked over to the driver's side door. He opened it and opened the glove compartment.

He took something out of it and opened Kali door and said "Hey Princess, get out last stop". "How dare you speak that way to a Goddess you worthless maggot" she said. "Yeah some Goddess couldn't even handle a little Archangel" he said.

"If it weren't for Gabriel's sacrifice I would kill you two right now" she said. "And if it weren't for Gabriel's dying wish we'd stake you" Dean said "He wanted us to give you this". He handed her a DVD similar to the one they watched that said Kali on it.

They put Kali's DVD into the labtop and pressed play. "We'll give you a minute " Sam said grabbing Dean's arm and walking off. Kali's eyes focused on the screen. Gabriel appeared sitting on the end of a bed.

"Kali, if your watching this, I didn't survive my little battle with Lucifer " he said. "I got a lot of explaining to do, I can't even begin to imagine what you must think of me now that you know what i am" He said with a sigh.

"Firstly, I want to say despite what you think I was never a spy for Heaven and i never was going to betray you or the others, truth is even though the Angels are my blood you guys were my real family" he said. Despite all her anger towards him she knew he was being honest.

"Also I want you to know, in my whole life I loved my family because that how God made me but you, you were one of the only people I ever choose to love" he said " I love you Kali, with all my heart, i never stopped loving you and i wish that i could be with you ".

"I want t tell you why i did what i did, my family are a both of douchebags, i was sick of them constantly fighting with each other so i left, i hid on earth and became Loki, then I meet you and that led me here. My whole life, i've run away instead of confronting my problems because i'm afraid, they were right, Anna was right, Dean was right, i am a coward but not anymore, I'm going to fight for what i believe in even if it kills me which it probably did" he said.

Kali didn't know what to think now that Gabriel was telling her the truth and professing his love for her. "Dumb and Dumber there they may be the last Hope this world has to stop Lucifer, please don't kill them" he said. '_I suppose if I'll let them live just so they stop Lucifer to avenge Gabriel and the others' _she thought.

"This is the end I guess so I just want you to know, I love Kali, more than any other in the world, more Freya, more then Aphrodite, to me it's always been you, you're my one true love, my soulmate, Marge to my Homer, Juliet to my Romeo, Summer to my Seth, I will always love you Kali, even in death" he said and with that the DVD ended.

Kali took out the DVD and walked over to the brothers "Good luck" she said before heading off. As she headed off she remembered all the good times she had with Gabriel or Loki or whoever he was. Despite being what he was and all the lies she still loved him and couldn't stand the heartbreak she felt because of his death.

She couldn't hold back the tears and for the first time in her life she cried. She thought of the Judeo Christian God, who was supposidely all powerful and loving yet he let Gabriel, the only Archangel who ever cared about his creation die and he let a monster like Lucifer live and she cursed for doing so and asked herself WHY?. And she begged from him to bring Gabriel back to her. She didn't care if he was a Trickster or an Archangel she just wanted him back, she just wanted the man she loved back.

Little did she know at that very moment sitting at his computer writing the first chapter of The Devil You Know, God heard her prayer and he smiled because he knew that very soon, he would answer her prayer.


End file.
